Doing good should come from the heart, with no strings attached. In my earlier years, I found immense joy in volunteering and helping others. It gave me a sense of purpose and fulfillment. However, over time, I began noticing a disheartening pattern: people were taking advantage of my kindness. The more I offered, the more they expected. I realized that some individuals were not interested in genuine help but in exploiting the good intentions of others.
This realization led me to step back from voluntary work. I felt drained, manipulated, and disillusioned. I no longer wanted to be someone’s endless source of support, especially when I sensed that sincerity was being taken for granted. Volunteering became less about kindness and more about obligation, a dangerous shift that can taint the purity of good deeds.
Now, I choose to do good in my own way. I help people when I feel it’s right—whenever, wherever, and to whomever I want. This newfound autonomy has empowered me. However, it hasn’t been without its challenges. I’ve been labeled racist, sexist, and accused of lacking common sense, simply because I refuse to extend my kindness to everyone indiscriminately. But I stand by my decision. No one should be coerced into doing good things, especially when their efforts are met with ingratitude or manipulation.
Forcing people to help everyone, regardless of the situation or the people involved, ruins the sincerity behind good deeds. The essence of kindness is lost when it’s done out of pressure or obligation. Doing good is a personal choice, a reflection of one’s values and desires—not something to be demanded.
It’s important to recognize that setting boundaries is not selfish; it’s necessary. People who take advantage of others often expect kindness without offering any in return, and in doing so, they exploit the very nature of goodwill. I refuse to let that happen. My kindness is not for sale, nor is it a commodity that can be claimed by anyone who demands it.
I no longer allow others to dictate when or how I should help. I’ve learned that genuine good deeds stem from a place of choice and sincerity, not from guilt or obligation. And if that makes me appear cold or indifferent in some people’s eyes, so be it. The joy of helping others, for me, now lies in the freedom to choose, and that’s something no one can take away from me.